Working for a change

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After a morning rethink, rather than going to an animal farm with Smallsteps, we decided to head to the grandparent's cottage, which is in the forest a couple hours north. This is likely to be the last year they are here, as they are getting older and the workload is too high for them to safely maintain, so they will sell.

They aren't happy about this as they love it here, but this is part of aging - losing what you love. Everything ends and that includes put abilities.

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I was talking with my father-in-law about life after he asked about my father's recent passing. My Finnish isn't up to this kind of conversation, but I try and he tries to be patient as I struggle to find words.

I was trying to explain how so many of the younger people I know have all kinds of issues and while they constantly advertise that they are living the best version of themselves - many are depressed, out of shape and disconnected from the world around them.

There seems to be a lack of meaning in their lives and because of this, they latch onto anything that they believe will give them some meaning, any platform to stand on.

As I was saying to my father-in-law, many are unhappy with their lives and want things to change, but don't want to take agency for themselves. Instead, they want someone to save them, someone to change the world for them. We spend our time blaming others and demanding they change for us, while avoiding looking in the mirror and seeing what we need to change in ourselves.

He asked me of I was satisfied in my life and I questioned what that might look like. I think that many believe that contentment comes from having what one needs, but I tend to disagree, I think it is about the attempt to make a life, even if failure is the result.

I used the example of if he gave me all of the things I needed in my life and how unhappy that would make me. Having what one needs is great, but when it is given rather than earned, it is empty. I value ownership of experience, which is probably why I am so attracted to Hive and I wonder if my life was provisioned by someone else, is it my life at all.

I think a lot of people live a provisioned life, but not one they have necessarily worked for. I think it is no surprise that people are unhappy, want change and will vote and support anyone who promises it. Anything to avoid looking in that mirror and finding out what is actually wrong in this world and actively making a change or, actively avoid it. The lack of reflection gives our ego immunity, as we can feign ignorance. Bliss.

My daughter is collecting pinecones from the forest floor around the cottage and she is taking her job seriously. Five euros for a full bucket and she just traded the five she got for the first, for a ten for the second. She can count, she knows ten is larger than five.

The job is meaningless for her, but she also knows that her grandparents like to have the area pinecone free and she lives to help. The reward isn't the money as that doesn't have meaning for her - the reward is doing something her grandparents appreciate and value. This is being part of a family, a part of a community.

And I think this is why so many people suffer life looking for meaning to attach themselves to, they have gained a sense of individualism, but lost family and community in the process. For two million years what we did was valuable because what it provided to the community, and our bodies haven't forgotten the importance of this, even though our culture has.

Taraz
[ Gen1: Hive ]



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(Edited)

At first I was wondering what she was holding them it dawned on me that it was a currency note. Well I think having to earn what we have sometimes makes us understands the value in other words one's possession can have more meaning when one understands how much they've worked hard for it.
Stunning write here. I have about 17k hp and I value it because overtime it took me a lot to get it.

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17k now - that is awesome

I think if things come too easy, we don't appreciate them - and we overestimate how hard life is.

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I used the example of if he gave me all of the things I needed in my life and how unhappy that would make me. Having what one needs is great, but when it is given rather than earned, it is empty. I value ownership of experience, which is probably why I am so attracted to Hive and I wonder if my life was provisioned by someone else, is it my life at all.

Outwardly I would be grateful if things were handed to me on a platter but inwardly, I'll forever question my merit to which the privileges were handed to me and even on the long run I'd constantly ask myself if I was living up to Tue expectations of my donor.

The provisioned life isn't freedom as a matter of fact its is imprisonment. SELF IMPRISONMENT.

However, the daily systems and way of life with the lost ethics of culture like you rightly pointed out is gradually killing conscience. We know we not happy with our jobs or source on income but the pressures heaped on us by the society and the need to live life lavishly sees families Waring with each other. Thanksgiving isn't what it is anymore but rather a once in a year time to come show off.

I look at us now and look into the future. Would remember who they are or would be lost to "LIFE'S STANDARDS"

Pathetic 😒

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The provisioned life isn't freedom as a matter of fact its is imprisonment. SELF IMPRISONMENT.

Exactly. We imprison ourselves in many ways - generally out of convenience.

It is pathetic, but I hope that a small fraction of us are fining a new way, leading to a new world.

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so much to talk and learn about from this post. Reading some of your posts have made me see some things in a different light.

I think it is about the attempt to make a life, even if failure is the result.

this is the part that spoke to me the most. i actually felt the weight of these words.

when i tell people to join hive, after five days of posting they get tired and the next day they come and say things like they are broke. i now wonder what could be the problem?
i begin to ask myself if there is any place where money is made without effort.
i mean an extra thirty dollars in a country like mine is a plus. i just came to the conclusion that people are just lazy even if you try to mentor them.

Very wonderful post

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i begin to ask myself if there is any place where money is made without effort.

People can enter the lottery and cross their fingers, but even that needs a purchase price.

Most people are lazy. The easy path is the hardest we will ever take, but many of us choose it over and over again.

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The easy path is the hardest we will ever take, but many of us choose it over and over again.

I don't get this. People even know this fact that the easiest way most times don't yield results but still choose it. The funny thing is that some of them say the famous quote that nothing good comes easy and still fault at this .. Such a paradox..

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As I said to my father-in-law tonight, people are idiots.

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Anything to avoid looking in that mirror and finding out what is actually wrong in this world and actively making a change or, actively avoid it.

I think I'm somehow guilty of this. I feel like I'm not satisfied with my life right now but it's looks so difficult to actually get up and make changes for myself. Very relatable post.

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Out of curiosity, what is stopping you?

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I cant even really place my hands on it. Probably the whole thought of starting something new.

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The hardest part is starting, as they say. I think we are hardwired to avoid difficulty and if we can't get over it, we are destined to struggle even more.

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Wow, the last line was quite powerful. We literally used to live for community.

A couple of people would hunt and everyone would eat. Some will protect, some will cook.

Nobody did it for themself, everyone had a job that benefited others. And that made the job important and gave some sense of self esteem, and importance to everyone.

Today, everyone is focused on themself only. When one talks about doing something for others, either it is NGO's or donations.

I think everyone should contribute a little bit for others. Not for the money or sense of satisfaction, but for the greater good of everyone.

Giving is so powerful.

Good post...thanks for sharing such good thoughts🙂

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Wow, the last line was quite powerful. We literally used to live for community.

A strong finish is more important than a good start. We indeed did live for community and without it, we literally died.

Giving is the definition of power. People think power is being able to take from others.

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If I may extend on you point about being given everything one wanted :

The reason I think people are unhappy/unsatisfied when they are given everything rather than earned, is because, if they haven't lived the journey towards achieving it, they've missed out on countless experiences that would have taught them how to wear it with pride. They've reached the destination without the experience of the journey and now they don't really understand what value the destination holds.

So in their head they have what they wanted. But they don't really feel the value of what they have. And unless we value what we have, we're never really happy or satisfied, are we!

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Precisely. The journey is valuable because it gives context to the destination, and without that experience, the destination is meaningless.

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Even at a young age I valued earning my own toys. If I wanted to modify my bike, I could, I did not have to ask permission of my parents, I earned it, bought and paid for it, it was 100% mine.

I think people have forgotten what it feels like to really earn something, I also think people have forgotten what community is. It is not about factions, about race, about religion, about government, community is about people all people. It is about working together for the benefit of all community members.

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I agree. People don't understand ownership, they think it is having - but they discount the responsibility component. It feels good to earn - people seem to have forgotten how.

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I agree that having a sense of belonging to a community is important. People do need meaningful relationships besides money, assets, status. If money would buy happiness then the poor should always be miserable. And that is not the case, sometimes the rich are feeling more down than the homeless.

It matters to live with a purpose. To live knowing you love and that you are loved. It is the quintessence of life itself.

!ENGAGE 20

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A sense of belonging... So many seem lost.

I think a lot of people chose the wealth and status at the expense of relationships and then use their wealth to try and fill the hole.

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Wealth can't buy souls and hearts and love. At least not the kind of love you need.

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"Siri, love me" ;D

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Oooh gosh, not so sure I would want to know what Siri answers 😂😂

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many believe that contentment comes from having what one needs, but I tend to disagree, I think it is about the attempt to make a life, even if failure is the result.

I think the key is realizing that to be content or to find contentment is to be satisfied. Your daughter looks satisfied just helping out. The simplicity in finding how to be content no matter what the surplus or lack of needs and wants is will be the trick. Learning how to find joy in the smallest things or how to appreciate the sorrow and suffering we all endure is where the change can come in. I believe it's truly all about perspective and how we as individuals influence our own thinking to learn how to be satisfied in any condition or circumstance. This will then tend to flow outward and establish a better connection with the world around us. Community was a great example to touch on and your example of finding contentment in the value here and perceiving the community as that true primary value in Hive seems to spill forward into how you approach and treat the community. I have always held a respect for the way you say what you mean and mean what you say.

By the way... what did you pops answer to what you said about the way folks are nowadays? I know that struggle with the language as my father in law is from Chile but now a Swede... so good thing this Texan figured out a little Swedish and knew a tiny sliver of Spanish. English is off the table with him. Hahahha Finnish is tough too.

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Appreciation and gratitude are key to contentment.

People chase happiness, but it is fleeting, just like sadness. Being accepting of the current conditions doesn't mean not working to change them, more, I think it is the starting point of effective and sensitive change.

That sounds like an interesting accent :D

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you know they say aging and losing is part of life that everyone has to face someday lets hope when our time comes there are people near and happy community to talk and care too

love.jpeg

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Whether people are there or not depends on whether we ourselves were there the rest of our life. Be present, it does wonders.

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I am working on finding water at the moment. Once I do, I plan to give it to my family. They have gone about 22 hours with no water so they really need it, even though I have gone 30. I was able to accumulate roughly 8 ozs of water from burning sea water. Problem is I cut down all the trees on my land. Times are tough ahead. Glad to hear your journey isn't like mine...

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Hopefully you get what you need in life.

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I hope engage tokens can be exchanged for 4 floz of water, is there an app for this?

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Depending on your location... if you had trees there should be water down below. It's tough work but you can dig around where the trees would have been and find the water table. It will be challenging if you don't have much water to be hydrated with... but it could be a great source now that the trees aren't drinking. There are guides on Youtube and other places on the internet about digging the well and how to find the right spot. Dig in the morning or night so not to waste energy. There is also ways to capture the humidity out of the air by trapping it. I will have you and your family in my prayers.

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I wish I knew you before I cut them all down, you're probably right. What I have now is a desert I created. I didn't know that youtube has the solution to find water, but I guess I will look there before I cut my whole forest down. This is why I will think more next time and be more resourceful. Bless you brother

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Seems like some kind of weird parody account - only 3 countries i the world use imperial measurement and the comments it has made are nonsense.

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I was talking with my father-in-law about life after he asked about my father's recent passing. My Finnish isn't up to this kind of conversation, but I try and he tries to be patient as I struggle to find words.

This is the sort of practice you need!

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Definitely. I should spend more time with them... or not :D

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@smallsteps would be the perfect poster girl for the Hive experience, by the way. Pinecones in a bucket, a fiver in her hand and a happy smile on her face.

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Yep - smallsteps, small tasks, small rewards - lead on to very big things.

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The very fact that you have that conversation with your FIL says something serious.

Living the best version of myself includes helping others when and where I can, it's just how I grew up. When Mt. St. Helens blew in 1980 the town I grew up in lost a ton of 'relief money' from the government because nobody waited to see what we should do, we just cleaned that shit up. The Federal emergency wasn't declared until 4 days after and we were about 2/3 done. People just brought trucks and tractors and cleaned it up.

It's just the way the world should be.

I'll say it again. That smallsteps is the cutest kid on the innerwebs. I'll bet Grammy and Grandpa are really happy to see her whenever she comes.

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People just brought trucks and tractors and cleaned it up.

I think this is what community is - doing what is needed together when it is needed. Too often these days, we wait for "someone else" to do the job.

I'll bet Grammy and Grandpa are really happy to see her whenever she comes.

They love her being there and she misses them heaps when they are there for 4 months of the year. They come back and forward to do their washing though. They promised to pick her up from daycare when they are here next - and she will hold them to it.

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Hello @tarakp,

I am very sorry for the recent death of your father, in a way I remember my father's death in 2011. My condolences also for all your family.

They aren't happy about this as they love it here, but this is part of aging - losing what you love. Everything ends and that includes put abilities.

This paragraph reminds me when my father was unfairly dismissed from the last formal job he had, I told him on that occasion, calm dad, every cycle comes to an end. This is true, but it hurts to suffer it firsthand when you reach retirement age. My father was not resigned, I started a job lawsuit, he was able to win it but in the end, he resigned so as not to harm some coworkers whom he appreciated. I miss him so much even though he lives in me.

The cycle will be affected no matter where you are, America, Asia, Europe, Oceania or Africa, the system is just like that. Obviously, this can and should be improved, it is our responsibility and thus avoid injustices as much as possible, caring for our elders, who are more advanced along the way, as well as creating the conditions for those who are beginning the journey.

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We often put so much of our life identity into work and then we retire and feel that we have lost a part of ourselves. I think it would be easier in many respects to "die working" which is perhaps part of the reason that artists never have to retire.

caring for our elders, who are more advanced along the way, as well as creating the conditions for those who are beginning the journey.

I think it is a cycle that can feed itself - the old help the young and the young help the old. I think the world we have created makes the elderly feel irrelevant - but that isn't the way it has to be.

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(Edited)

You are right, this is wrong and we should -everyone within the scope of their influence- change it.

Not only the elderly feel irrelevant, but also many young people who unfortunately the system molds based on the interests of very few. However, there is always a way and it is up to you to find it, just as disruptive artists do.

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The young feel very irrelevant, because they live their life treating people as disposable objects - making themselves disposable in the process. They chase meaning by trying to make themselves feel important by doing things that are of little importance.

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An attitudinal problem that undoubtedly converges on a larger one: existential.

Changing attitudes is not easy by virtue of the fact that we expose our system of values and beliefs determining how we act. If someone considers you disposable and uses you, they should not complain after they discard him too, in short, they are apples from the same basket. The worst thing is that being frivolous and utilitarian, they also become inconsequential, meaningless in life, a very sad experience that plagues most of our society.

I think we have to go back to the simple, to what made us successful in the natural world and that we have lost in the artificiality of our cities.

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avoiding looking in the mirror and seeing what we need to change in ourselves

It's probably because this is uncomfortable and as we all know discomfort is to be avoided at all costs XD I have known people like this and they seem to very much have an attitude of why should they have to change.

If someone wanted to give me everything I needed to be contented, what I need is time and to get more time I need J to retire so what I actually need is enough money for J to retire while maintaining our lifestyle so he can homeschool the kids (and I'd totally go on excursions with them because J can drive longer than me and also doesn't have driving anxiety unlike some people so we would go to some epic places). That would be awesome as then I might actually be able to get some sleep so I can work better XD

The job is meaningless for her, but she also knows that her grandparents like to have the area pinecone free

That appears to make it meaningful?

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Money plays such an incredibly stupid part in our lives - it is a trap - work for less than it is worth so that those we work for can get more than they need, never have enough to do what we could do without money...

That appears to make it meaningful?

For her it is meaningful. She likes helping them do stuff, she likes being involved in their processes.

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So she’s derived meaning from it, kids are smarter than most adults 😆

Money is useful as a trading tool. Other people’s obsession with accumulating as much as possible by any means possible is irksome 🙄

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