Failure Can Be An Adventure to Adapt and Overcome

If you don’t find how many ways to fail, you really have failed.

“Do it right the first time”

That line was drilled into me as I grew up.

My mother believed every job, every challenge, must be done right the first time. Anything else was failure.

She gave instructions, total compliance expected. If I didn’t meet those expectations, then I failed to follow instructions. No matter how careful or exact I was. The failure was mine, never the instructions.

The number one rule to be remembered — mother was not always right, but, she was never ever wrong. No matter what.

She instilled a strong sense of shame about failure. To her, failure to accomplish was failure of me as a person.

“If you don’t make mistakes, you aren’t really trying.” — Coleman Hawkins

Repeating a job incurred her wrath, delivered verbally and physically, if not done with lightening speed and accuracy. Best read her mind to know her wishes, spoken and unspoken.

Do not argue, do not suggest. You will be wrong.

Those early lessons stayed with me. The most important person in my life taught me to fear imperfection. Took a very long time to not feel a sense of impending doom when something doesn’t work out. It still rears its head in the last half of my life.

When I started to embrace the mantra “Shit happens”, I finally started to relax about failure.

Because, shit happens, right?

I did have to be careful not to relax to the point of not trying again when something didn’t go as plan. That would be giving up. Something didn’t work as planned, take an unflinching look at what didn’t work. Can it be fixed? Try again.

If it can’t be fixed or the idea was just flawed. Admit it, try a different concept to the same destination or move on.

Because, shit happens, right?

Trying multiple times to gain the goal can actually make success that much sweeter.

It’s liberating to learn making mistakes is okay. Every mistake is how not to solve a problem. Learn wrong ways, it makes remembering the right way a whole lot easier.

Thinking skills engage to identify mistakes. Finding new ways calls on more thinking skills and creativity. I’ve found I'm more comfortable adapting to situations. Adapting is more course adjustment than course change.

Because, shit happens, right?

Think of a problem solving like an adventure. Mistakes shape the path to discovery. Discovery is the bricks laid to success.

Problem solving becomes fun. Focus on eliminating the wrong paths to find the right path. Arriving at the destination will be a sweet victory.

And remember, shit happens, right?

Adapt and overcome

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*Shadowspub is a writer from Ontario, Canada. She writes on a variety of subjects as she pursues her passion for learning. She writes on other platforms like Hive, Medium and Vocal. *

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