Viewing the world through the prism of my own inherent selfishness

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(Edited)

 

I recently had a casual conversation with a young gentleman over Facebook about something to do with, "wouldn't it be great if we could all just get along?" It's a great quality, admirable even, to want everyone to get along to an extent where we aren't shooting, stabbing, or constantly arguing with one another, right?

I once used to think like that -- the Utopian dynasty of my imagination where everyone was happy and getting along peacefully, and working together.

I've since ditched such notions because I have a better and clearer understanding of humans and humanity these days. Even the people that call themselves tolerant, understanding, and full of love can be found acting in the most inhumane way to others they can't agree with, or dislike fundamentally. I think once I was attacked by a self proclaimed "Crystal healer that had an abundance of love to give" over the internet. Thus, such is life.

But I'd like to delve deeper into the idea that everyone fundamentally, at the core, whatsoever, can't get along. For this to essentially happen everyone would have to be over the poverty line, not have had a bad childhood, have an abundance of help if they did have a bad childhood, and have a long line of men/women waiting to date them and be their partners. We know that statistically this is impossible. Or at least I hope we know this. Because there are just too many people in the world and too many variables that surround them. People are affected by their environment and vice versa.

Let's take the example of a woman being beat down physically by her partner; if I were to say, "all men are trash" then both of those two would react differently to that statement -- their worldview skewed by their upbringing, experience, knowledge and current situation. Also, other people that weren't directly involved with this situation would react differently to it too. We all react differently to information presented to us, and I'd love to state the claim that the world is subjective. A panoramic view of the everglades could mean one thing to me, and an entirely different concept and meaning to you, the reader. You see where I'm going with this?

Deep down we're all selfish, viewing the world through the dictation of how we feel at that moment in time. Take me for example, I like to give freely and openly whenever I have the spare time and money to do so, but I don't do it solely because someone needs my help. I do it for the good feeling it gives me as I watch their reaction to my awesome help. I often question the fact that is selflessness inherently selfish? What do you think?

We all view the world through our own prism of inherent selfishness; even as I sit here typing this out to you. I'm writing this today because of the factors in today that brought me along to this mindset. The discussion I had with the young gentleman on Facebook, and my love of social psychology and economics, plus my free time. A hand crafted post just for Neoxian City.

Take the way you're dissecting this post. Some people will take it all in, bit by bit, really love it and perhaps give me a shout out in the comments section (yay!). Other people will drive by, up-vote and perhaps read the first line because they generally know me as a person. Other people, blinded by their rage, may down-vote this post because they don't like my writing! I get it; swings and roundabouts.

But there's just too many people in the world for us to all get along. Too many conflicting theories, religions, ideologies; too many people trying to accomplish ownership over other people. I think when you say, "I just wish everyone would get along" then you aren't allowing people breathe and truly flourish. You are essentially saying, "I wish people would act in a way that I find appropriate" -- which is rather controlling when you think about it. Deep down, aren't you trying to control outcomes? Think about it now!

I'm not saying I advocate for violence or that I'm happy some people get shot and stabbed; I'm only saying that sometimes bad shit happens and people don't get along. Sometimes conflict needs to happen for a resolution to appear -- that's how we move forward in life.

For me I've found the trick is tolerance, acceptance, and open mindedness and to approach situations with empathy and kindness. Sometimes I'll never accept the point of view of another person -- that doesn't mean I can't listen to them and hear them out.

People are angry because of the way they feel inside. Happy people don't generally go around causing conflict with others -- at least that's how I feel. I've always wanted to understand that anger in others better; what motivates someone to scream, shut down and not listen. What factors in their life are out of control and how can I help?

If you want to create love and kindness in the world then you need to be a force for that yourself. You can't scream for empathy one minute and then scream at someone else for not listening to you the very next.

These days I usually accept that some things just are the way they are, and there's nothing I can do about it. If there's one thing I've learned in life is that it has a nifty way of eventually balancing itself out. That pendulum swings for a reason; life essentially evens out in the end.

As Forrest Gump tells us.

Life is like a box of chocolates. You nevva know what ya gunna get


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