Little Cherine Book 05 - BPost029

“Are you going to change into a wolf?”

“What for? I’m much more dangerous as I am.” He acted as if I had said something hilariously funny. He sat on a fallen palm tree, wiping his eyes. I waited until he calmed down.

Previous: Book 05 - Post 028

3081

“So, what are you doing out here?”

“I was just taking a walk Sammy.”

“You!? This is the same father I know who is too lazy to make his own coffee? You wanted to be alone to think. That Edith, she really upset you?”

“There are times when I miss being a Normal - at least then my thoughts were private.”

“Bull!” I grinned. “I did not need to feel you dad. Even as a Normal I would have known what is bothering you. It is not making love to us that bothers you, so what is it?”

“My stupid speech. If I write what I want to say I can argue my points, but when I talk impromptu, I begin making a point and then wander off to another point that occurred to me and I forget to make any points through to the end. It makes me sound stupid.”

“I wouldn’t worry about it,” I comforted him, “we’re all used to it by now.” I touched his hand. “Tell me what is really worrying you please.”

He did not look at me, his eyes gazing into the dark distance. “The penal planet. Considering all I said, do I have the right to interfere?”

“Gosh, I think I better wake them all so that they can hear this! You rid this world of monsters and you are having qualms about it?”

“What makes them become like that Sam? They started off life as innocent children. By taking them out of the equation I could be prolonging the process. There are many decent men and women worrying about the existence of such monsters. Studies are being made, money is spent on studying them and what makes them tick. As they do so, the Normals begin to understand themselves, as a race I mean. By ridding the world of them we provide a false comfort. They will think mankind must be doing something right for there are less monsters now. They will stop looking for ways to change themselves so that children do not grow up into adults of that kind.”

I shook my head in wonder. “You are slanting the facts to suit your need to feel guilty. You know that nobody is doing anything to solve the problem, they are not even concentrating on finding the worst of the abusers…who are people in power and those so wealthy they are considered untouchable - only arresting those who are vulnerable and easy for them to find, because they collect stolen photos and videos.

This sounds like the discussion we had about helping street kids in Athens. Are you telling me Robert that you are contemplating returning men like the butcher who slit Marita’s throat, just so as not to affect their useless fucking statistics?” He gets uncomfortable when any of us use swear words, but he hardly noticed this time. Of course he will ‘hear’ my words later and have something to say about it. I normally see no need for swear or ‘dirty’ words. The English and Greek languages have many words that are just as effective and swearing is a sign of failure or ignorance of language. Sometimes though, it feels good to use one just for the shock effect. (There, I got my excuses in before he said anything, so hopefully I won’t have a lecture again.)

“Of course I won’t Sam. Why do you find it such a problem whenever I need to think about actions I’ve taken or must take in the future? You are always re-examining your own motives and actions. Every sentient being must, or else it is not truly sapient in those ways that matter.”

“I see. Do my questions then reveal that I am not truly sentient in ways that matter - just in bed?”

Laughing he replied, “That is the one place I’m not always convinced you are sentient. You cheeky brat, you’ve succeeded in breaking me out of my mood, what do we do with this lovely moon and the sound of tropical surf?”

“Well,” I drawled, “it has been a while since I was non-sentient. Would you like to remind me what it is like?”

He looked at my tiny matchstick arms and legs and pulled a face. “Like that I will have to be very sentient.” I took my bikini off and grew to about eleven, just when my breasts are slightly budding. “Sam, you must block yourself from the others. They need their sleep.”

“They’d kill me if I did that. They won’t mind waking up to lovely feelings.”

3082

He sent his mind out to them. “No. Jade needs at least another three hours. I’ll take the blame Sam, do as I ask.”

Since he was providing the correct motivation I decided not to argue. I stuck my tongue out at him. “You’ll have to catch me first. No cheating, just your Normal senses.” I ran off and stopped, he was still sitting, looking at me. “Are you saying I’m not worth chasing?” I teased.

“Oh, I’ll chase you. I was just giving you a fair head start.”

“You’re kidding!?” As a born Cherinian I had the advantage, what was he thinking of? I was stymied, I cannot hurt his male pride by saying so. Oh well, I thought, and ran again. As I ran out of sight he was still sitting as far as I could see. I ran a bit further and, breathing hard by now, I stopped by a fallen palm tree. I sat down, keeping an eye out for him, ready to run again as he comes around the curve of the beach. It will still give me a lead of about a hundred meters. I soon got off the log, sitting on it bare-bottomed was not a good idea. I walked into the warm water, splashed around a while and sat on the white sand. I was beginning to get a little disheartened by now and considered walking back. I was also a little miffed at him. Ten minutes later I carefully walked back, ready to run if I see him. I came to the curve and saw the beach ahead was empty! Really upset now I walked with my head down, trying to stop tears from flowing - I was not going to let him see he had hurt me.

I heard a noise behind me and as I jerked to run, his hand caught hold of my arm. He burst out laughing like a little kid, full of himself.

“You cheated!!”

“I did not! I did not use any Cherinian gifts. You said I can use my Normal senses and I did. You used your body and I used my brain.”

I looked at him suspiciously. Had he done this just to teach me a lesson? I guess the funny side of it caught up with me and I giggled. He looked so adorable with that smirk on his face.

“I have an idea. Hold my hand.” We rose into the air and flew over the water. We could hardly see the darkness within the darkness that showed where the coast is. He hovered and I saw a shimmer beneath us. We floated down and landed slightly above the water. “I made us a soft mattress. It will roll with the waves, but if we get too violent it could end up dunking us.”

“Not me. I hope you enjoy a swim at night.” I reached for his face and kissed him.

We both surprised ourselves by our tenderness. His lips felt so soft and warm I had to keep returning to them. Slowly I felt a burning begin within my belly. I crushed his lips so hard that his teeth hurt my lips, but it only made the fire spread and yet at the same time concentrate between my legs. I’m not the type of girl who bites and scratches, but without realising it my nails were digging into him. As he opened the senses of his body to me I felt what I was doing to him and the pleasure it gave him. I let go and concentrating only on the sensations of our bodies I let my hands and mouth do what they will without my inhibiting them.

His damn mattress was bobbing up and down and water was splashing over us. As my lips and teeth worked their way down I felt he was too close to exploding.

“No! No! Stop. I want you in me!” I pulled away and lying on my back I opened my legs. Without hesitation he rolled over onto me - half submerging us in seawater for a moment.

“God! You smell like a sea-goddess!” No longer able to hold back he raised himself. Having just changed body age I was a virgin again and he tore through my hymen and I cried out. My body was out of control, trying to buck and twist, but our floating mattress kept sloshing water over us. His fingers twined within mine, he pulled my hands above my head until I was stretched. I was hardly aware of biting into his shoulder and thought the salty taste was seawater.

His body a soft heavy warmth now, he settled over me and I felt myself engulfed within a love that has no beginning and no end. I began to cry and as I sobbed he tenderly kissed my face, licking at my tears. Softly his words caressed me and I fell into a deep sleep.

3083

Dommi tells me that every single love that has ever existed has a bitter-sweetness to it and the stronger the love the more urgent the bitter-sweetness. After such a night, any woman would be clinging to her man with adoration pouring out of her eyes. The most beautiful woman in the world can walk past and he will not even glance at her, for his heart will be wildly calling to the love in his arms. After the sun flushed the skyline as it gazed upon our love, we returned to the bungalow and with a last soft kiss I left him so that he can turn his heart to sweet little Jade who needs to be loved. He held her on his lap and she snuggled against him with eyes happy and a heart that sang sweeter than Wendy. Can any Normal woman understand us? Such a woman must be rare.

Speaking about Normal people and their ways. There is one oddity of theirs I should record for the future. When their men are about to go into battle or take part in a sport, they believe the man must not make love the night before. They are so blind to their own hearts and bodies that they believe making love will weaken them!! There has not been one crisis, a single time of stress or battle that we have not loved our man at every opportunity and it has only strengthened him. The opposite also is just as valid. Knowing that Jade still has a difficult day to return to, Robbie and all of us loved her tiny body and filled her heart until she shimmered like a pink nebula cloud. When she stood on the stage again, she radiated such quiet energy and happiness that many eyes stayed glued on her even after the storytelling began.

I would not be honest if I said I was certain how the storytelling would have gone if the CherInguel had not been with us, but since they were, it was slanted against Robbie, showing him as being intolerant and prejudiced. Those who know him well guessed what is happening and why, but still, it did leave a sour taste in our mouths. I think the only one who was pleased was Robbie.

There was silence as the girls ended their telling. Dommi stood up.

“I think we are all tired, but I suggest we only take a short break for those unfortunate few whose healers can’t control their bladders much longer. We were going to do it after the next and final storytelling, but I sense we all need it now. Please return in half an hour for a golden circle of love.” Cherine gave a small smile, but otherwise did not react. Everyone else showed that Dommi had sensed correctly, that they are glad.

We did not go to the club. We jumped home.

“I do not think I have ever been as proud of you as I was tonight. I wish I knew how you girls do it. You always seem to tell our story in exactly the way they need to hear it.”

They all blushed and Meli shyly explained, “Robert, we feel what they need to hear. Mostly that comes to us from Wendy and Candy. As we tell the story there are those who are broadcasting their need to have a particular part explained more clearly so we try to.”

“It is still amazing. Wendy, every storytelling you and Candy improvise, making up your music and words as you go and despite that you are still able to reach out to your audience! All I can sense is how I feel!”

With Robbie making such a big thing of it the girls could have happily gone back on stage and carried on for another ten hours. That secret part of me that watches cannot help noticing that Robbie hardly ever heaps praise on us, but if we do something extraordinary he always notices - however caught up he is in his own problems - and makes sure he shows us he did. I realised it is part of what makes him such a good leader; praise lavished too freely has little meaning and the lack of praise when due, destroys the spirit. I suppose I’m acknowledging him as leader of our family, but then it has long been obvious. Not bad going for a nerd!! ;-)

(You’re crossing the line girlie!) (Sorry dad, forgot, the word is geek now!) LOL

I think Savva was sorry our golden circle of love was not held in his precinct. I can imagine the feelings of the people who work or live close to our hall, but I would love to know how it affected all our alien friends. It was the first time we have seen any of them cry. Our darling Asimi knelt on all three legs and with her lovely hair hanging over her face wept. Sharipya stood there like an oaf, not knowing how to react. Lucy ran in and put her arms around Asimi and that unfroze Sharipya. The look of love he should have given Asimi he gave to Lucy, in gratitude of course, but still…

Robbie took our alien friends to Freddie. They needed space to move around, I’m surprised they have lasted this long. Most Terran Cherinians waited to watch Robbie take them and there were a number of faces that showed they are awed. Somehow Dommi got into conversation with Edith. She is from the Earth where the girls got lost on. Cherine had found her in Hong Kong, befriended her and invited her to become a Cherinian. If I understood it correctly, Cherine got talking to her when she found out they were from the same area in England. Dommi reassured us that Cherine had not linked her just because she was homesick, Edith is actually a nice person. About half of us reserved judgement. We are slower to forgive anyone who attacks our man.

3084

A while later Dommi took Robbie across and he also talked with her. It seems she has become spokesperson for those who have reservations about him. As the storytelling had progressed though, they had melted away and she is not so vociferous anymore. Robbie was being very ‘British stiff upper-lip’ which is not like him. He spoke very seriously and she listened to him for a while before it finally dawned on her that he was pulling her leg. I suppose her Cherine gave him a few clues for it seems his dry humour got to her. She was soon relaxed and chatting, hardly ever smiling, but there was a twinkle in her eyes that showed she was paying Robbie back. When I thought it was safe for me to intrude I joined them.

“Samantha? Pleased to meet you.”

“Pleased to meet you. Do you live in Hong Kong?”

“Oh no, good gracious! We gave it back to China a couple of years ago. Cherine convinced me to join them in Greece.”

“I hear Robert is selling well.”

She nodded, a small tightness to her lips. “Yes. Not that I understand why. All his pictures are so dark and gloomy.”

“Perhaps he has a lot of nightmares to rid himself of?”

She’d forgotten I am not a seven year old and was startled by my comment. I laughed. “Edith, I’m not much younger than you. Probably about six years if you are the age you look.”

She had the grace to blush and look at Robbie in apology. He grinned and inverted a cliché. “Don’t let Sammy get to you. She is far more dangerous than she looks.”

“You are worse than my Robert!” She locked eyes with me. “I think you are going to become a legend. The first Cherinian to imprison her Robert. Would you really have killed him?”

“I was a baby, it is difficult for me to know what I would have done. I don’t think I could have. I would have had to kill Cherine also. All I recall is being terrified that I was right and even more that I was wrong. By the way, what do you mean ‘the first’?” I asked sweetly, certain it was a slip of the tongue.

I thought I’d got the better of her, but she laughed. “I cannot count how many times I have heard the story. It had something to do with a number of girls kidnapping my Robert and keeping him imprisoned…” I flushed and Robbie grinned at my discomfort. I know it will take me a while to live this one down. It is actually his fault! He introduces me with a warning attached, deliberately to provoke me into living up to the name he is trying to create for me and then dares to laugh when I fall flat on my face.

Cherine hugged me from behind. “Don’t worry Sam, he didn’t remember either.”

Allan came over. “Is he playing tricks on you my love? Why don’t you leave him to his misery and join us. Our little girl would like to be with you for a while.” Happily I went to join them.

Sharipya was the first to complain and then the others joined him. He was objecting to the way the girls had told the story, insisting to all who would listen to him that they have gone out of their way to make him look like a hero while downplaying the role of Robbie. He tried re-interpreting the story for his listeners, but he was not having much success. Asimi was trying to hide a grin, but dutifully kept quiet. She has seen the truth in our minds and knows why and what we are trying to do. She is proud of him for trying though.

Now I’m certain! Jade cannot have seen everything she picts! I think she needed to make clear the character and strength of our Robbie (why I do not understand, since everyone was already overwhelmed by his numerous sufferings) and she showed a close-up of his face when he was attacked by the Gnolat and pulled out slowly to show it slit his body open. The storytelling had to stop as many jumped to throw up and others cried. Robbie looked angry, but she was not repentant. Cherine stood next to her with her fists clenched, so Robbie kept quiet. I think crossing both of them at the same time is too much even for him. What am I saying? All of us would have taken her side. We hear them, the visitors, not only their verbal comments. Comments about his eyes, his stern face that at times looks timeless so that he can be twenty or two thousand years old. About the way he will suddenly drift away as they talk to him, lost in thoughts or a world of his own. If they think they have the right to judge him, then they must see what he has suffered to preserve all of life. He is not some stupid pretty president voted in because of money and charm and all the shenanigans politicians get up to. He is our leader because he cares and lives only to protect and guide us to a future worthy of all Cherinians. Sorry, if I sound like a fanatic, but he does bring it out in me at times - even if I love sparring with him.

3085

Robbie asked everyone to jump to the club. Now that the telling had ended, Apostoli brought out wine and beer and soon everyone was eating and drinking. Robbie softly asked a few close friends to get up and dance and after a while he took Jade to the dance floor and danced with her. We should have guessed. He made a total arse of himself, made all the kids laugh and embarrassed the hell out of Jade. Dommi told us it was good he did so. Cherinians should never forget he is also a man, a human being with his faults, or else they might end up idolising him. I grinned.

“Dommi love, look around you. Even the aliens are reacting to his playing the fool by idolising him. Everyone knows what he is doing and they love him even more for doing it. He can’t win.”

Robbie picked up Jade and holding her tightly to him he stood swaying to the music, his eyes closed and face dreamy as his hand tenderly kneaded her back. I think I saw a glint of tears on her lashes and knew she was happy. Cherine took my arm and led me out onto the beach. It was cold and windy, the smell of coming rain in the air. She did not seem to notice, so I did what I can to protect the both of us from the elements.

She stopped at the gently lapping water, facing out to sea. “Will you jump with me Sam?” She took us to an alternate world. “I had to be certain your reactions will not betray me. Sam, I’ve asked the other Cherines to take turns keeping you all linked, I’m leaving for a while. Please don’t ask me where I’m going.”

“I can’t do that Cherine. Someone has to know. I will keep it a secret, you know I will, but only for as long as I feel it is right to do so. Why are you telling me instead of Robbie?”

She glanced at me and looked away again. “It is typical of you. Everyone else would demand why or where, but you respect my rights and only want to know why I tell you. I’m worried about Robert. Sam, I’m going to hurt him again. You will have to be strong for him.”

“For how long Cherine?”

She hunched her shoulders. “I don’t know. Maybe weeks, maybe months.”

“It won’t work Cherine. Robert will find you, even if he has to ask every Sparkler and Anadir to help him. If he thinks he has lost you, not even all of us together can be his strength.” I had a sick feeling in my stomach. “Cherine, if he thinks you left because you don’t love him, it will kill him.”

She turned and looked into my eyes as she gripped my shoulders. “Robert, I love you more than anything else in the world. Ollo kosmo as you say. I promise I will return, but there is something I have to do. I’m not saying this face to face because you will get angry with me and try to argue. Robert love, I have to do this and I have to do it now, please don’t find me until I’m ready to return. Also, please don’t go anywhere in Freddie until I’m with you.” She leant forward and kissed me. Without thinking my eyes closed and she was gone.

I sat on the sand, my whole body trembling. The thought of returning and facing Robbie with this was unbearable. Words rushed through my mind, words I should have spoken to stop her. Tears were stinging my eyes, but I refused to cry. I had to try and think this through. For instance, where can Cherine have gone? If she has arranged with the other Cherines to replace her, it means she will not be on our Earth. I knew she was not on this Earth, I’d felt the link snap and I cannot jump home until the Cherine of this reality returns. What if she stays away for days!? I looked around and realised I am fairly close to the hotel we stay at in the Seychelles. I was certain they will give me a bungalow…shit! I’d forgotten, this is not our Earth, we have never stayed here. The worst of it was that I had come here as a seven year old and cannot age myself. Now I understood why Robbie is so rigid about our carrying passports with us when jumping out of Greece.

I think the only thing that prevented me from becoming afraid was the knowledge that Cherine would not have left me stranded here without making arrangements. It made me wonder, when did she talk to the other Cherines and why did they agree to help her? At least it was a comfort that they have. What she has to do must be something every Cherine sympathises with.

3086

I walked along the beach trying to decide what to say to Robbie when I stepped on a sharp dried frond. I had to sit down and pull it out. I thought the pain will stop when I did, but it continued to burn and I thought it felt worse now. I began to cry. Not because of the pain. Because I’d realised this is how it will be for Robbie. When the link came I hardly noticed and it was only the soft hand of Cherine on my hair that brought me back to myself.

“Don’t cry Sam, you’ll be proud of her when she returns.”

I stood up. “Whatever it is, she should have explained to Robert. Cherine, it is family business. Can I go home?”

“Family Sam? I thought we are all family?”

“I’m sorry. I need to get to Robert.” She hugged me and then I jumped.

The girls crowded around me, full of questions. Only Robbie, Dommi, Aganthi, Wendy and Rosie sat apart. He looked so pale that the thought of me speaking the words made me want to run to the bedroom and hide.

*Will she come back?*

His words tore me apart and I burst into tears even as I answered she will. He was instantly by me and took me within his arms. He shushed me, stroking my hair. “She has her reasons Sammy baby, don’t cry. We’ll just have to wait for her.”

“She said it could be months.” I cried out. For the first time ever I wished I cannot feel him as something seemed to tear within him.

“It is not another man Roberto mou.” Dommi said.

“I know my love. Why can’t she speak to me though? Have I changed so much?”

“We’ve all changed Roberto.”

My eyes fixated on those of Cherine. She is the one Robbie still calls baby Cherine.

“You are wrong Sam. She did not tell us her reasons, but we could sense it is something good that she needs to do. We all trust her Sam.”

“I’m sorry, I jumped to conclusions.”

“I’m not surprised Sam, you’ve spent your whole life studying Roberto and trying to become like him. Roberto, so our little Cherine has decided to spread her wings at last. You must be very proud of her.” Alki had walked in a minute earlier.

“Robert, she left a message for you in my mind, will you come in and listen to her?” He did and when we opened our eyes he felt calmer.

“We’ve been through worse, we can wait for her. Protector.” It appeared. “A part of you is in her. Find her and watch over her. Do not let her know you are there unless you have to help her. This is a prime order: you are never to let me know where she went, what she said or did. Only Cherine is allowed to tell me.”

Without replying it disappeared. Robbie spoke to us. “I have demanded you all implicitly trust me. I now ask that you all show her the same trust. She must have her own reasons for wanting to keep her trip a secret and you better all respect them.”

Candy said, “Maybe she wants to give us a surprise Robbie.”

He smiled at her. “She’s done that alright my love. Okay, everybody back to your studies.”

“No Roberto, not after these last days. Everybody who wants to come, get dressed. We’ll go to Kefalari and afterwards we can go to a movie. Time for some fun girls.” Dommi turned to Alki. “Ask your kids to join us Alki.”

3087

I did not feel like going so I sat here and brought the diary up to date. I have some thoughts I cannot write about yet, not after what Robbie said. Robert, it is not my fault, I got suspicious and then the answer came to me. I will keep it a secret though.

Nearly a week has passed and Robbie surprised us this morning. At breakfast he told everyone that from now on the diary is off-limits to everyone. Knowing our ways, he spelt it out, also forbidding them from entering my mind unless invited. He also promised me he will not monitor me or read the diary.

“Sam, go write and if you want to and Cherine allows it, open yourself to her. We all want these days written. The first time a Cherinian has voluntarily cut herself off from all Cherinians should be recorded.”

“You make it sound dramatic dad. It isn’t.”

“You may not realise it love, but your attitude has affected us all. When you came back to give us the message you were in shock. Within a day though, your emoting altered and it gave us all the feeling that you knew where she is and approved. I’m damned if I can work out how you guessed, but I’m glad you did.”

I hugged him as hard as I can and then hugged my daughter to me and taking her with went to the garden and sat for a while just enjoying the feeling of her in my arms. She is the extension of the love I feel for my Robbie and that makes her doubly precious to me. When I came to write, I sat here feeling as if all my pain and anxieties had been washed out of me.

Okay, this is what I think happened.

Cherine has gone to help her children.

She has been worried for some time now. They are not doing well, they are running out of money and the baby has not made life easier for them. They still allow their guilt to tear at them and whenever they make love, the next day is painful and they hardly talk to each other.

Chapter One Hundred and Fifty Two

My problem was how to get to Cherine. The link of ‘baby’ Cherine means I cannot ‘find’ our Cherine. I have a sort of general idea of where the kids are, but if I jump to South Africa they will all guess the truth. Giving me privacy does not extend to not knowing where I am. I knew I cannot just cut the link with the present Cherine, it will leave me with almost no abilities. It did seem the sort of puzzle I enjoy, so I thought about it without becoming disheartened.

I cannot ask the protector to help me as Robbie has impulsively given it instructions not to, and it is too late to change the order now. It would sound so dramatic if I had to struggle for days and then with a brilliant brainwave I found her, but the truth is, it was too obvious. I went to the void and releasing a part of her soul, first attaching a part of mine, I sent it back to her on the ‘like is attracted to like’ theory. Included with my part was a message to her. I let her hear what Robbie had said and added my request that she open a link to me. I also suggested she meet me in the void if she is worried about linking me.

You never give up Sam, do you? How did you work out I was on our Earth?

I knew what your problem was, so I guessed you were using ‘baby’ Cherine to camouflage your presence. Don’t worry, the others haven’t guessed. Wasn’t Robbie great?

There is no point in continuing the pretence. I’ll let my sweet baby sister know she can return home. The others must promise not to interfere.

I was feeling silly with happiness and laughed. *I thought I was going to have an exclusive! Robbie would not have stopped you love, he might have even been hoping you will do something. He says things on the spur of the moment and then finds himself trapped by his own words. I’m going back to my body to wait for you.*

3088

She was thoughtful enough to wait for me to return and rejoin the others before she communicated with ‘baby’ Cherine. She giggled and looked at me.

“She says you are like the Gnolats - you never let go.”

“Sam!”

“I didn’t do anything Robert. I found her and asked to watch, but she changed her mind. She wants to link us all again. I think she was also suffering. Dad, I did promise you will not interfere.”

“In what?”

“That is up to her to tell you.”

We were linked back to our Cherine.

As the couple got ready to leave us, ‘baby’ Cherine said with a smile, “Don’t you think it is time for you to stop calling me ‘baby’ Cherine?”

Robbie smiled at Robert. “They grow up so quickly,” he said sadly and we giggled.

Rob cocked his head at his Cherine and she smiled. “I’ll tell you a secret Robert. Whenever I’m feeling a little sad or nostalgic my love changes herself to a toddler for me to hold in my arms. It is the sweetest possible feeling.”

Fondly she remonstrated, “Now they’ll keep on calling me baby Cherine!” Hugging each other they jumped, leaving behind them a sweetness of love for us to feel.

“I wonder what it would be like to be one of the other Roberts.”

*Then I guess you wouldn’t be my Robert.* Cherine’s amused voice came through. Everyone laughed from their joy at hearing her voice, everyone except me that is. I had just realised something. *No Sam!* she shouted in our minds.

“I think so Cherine.” Curious they turned to me. “Robert, I’m not sure how you will take it. It is just an idea so pleased don’t get upset.”

“What is it love?”

“You and Allan, in many ways you are more like each other than you and the other Roberts.” I became too excited and blurted out, “Can’t you see? It is Arthur, he made you be as you are! Remember Allan said he imagined you to be as himself, an ideal Allan.”

That made Cherine jump back. Robbie grabbed her and held her to him as if his life depended on it. He smothered her in kisses and when we finally saw her face it was a bright red. She laughed. “I should disappear more often.”

That made him squeeze her again and she gasped, but her eyes were shining. I could also feel her, but the truth is my mind was mostly on what I thought is the explanation to our questions. This was so exciting to me that it muted everything else. With a mock sigh Robbie sat down, not letting Cherine go, and asked me: “Okay Sam, explain before you burst.”

“I know why you have a protector!”

“Because of Arthur you said?”

“Dad, I can quote to you Allan’s words. Listen:

I saw you as a sort of anti-hero. A soft guy without abilities being thrust into situations which forced him to be more than he was - if that makes any sense to you. At the time it was possible for me to imagine myself being you and handling everything at least as well as you did. To me your strengths were your ability to love wholeheartedly and your need to protect those you love, without really being effective at it and so you had to have a protector - sort of a father figure who will look after your primes and yet give you the satisfaction of being the one who is really doing the job. Those qualities I saw in you are how I saw myself, or at the worst, as an idealised version of myself.

3089

I am certain that was how Arthur saw it too. I think in the beginning, when he did not believe you exist, he had more influence over you. By believing you, we, are real, he has lost some of his assurance that we are characters in a story he can manipulate - or maybe he no longer thinks he has the right. The other Roberts only came into our lives later.”

Robbie called for Allan and they jumped over. Alki sensed from next door that something is happening and he came. I had to explain to them again. Allan looked sad, troubled.

“I’m sorry, I should not have said that.”

“I have to know, is Sam right?”

“I don’t know how to reply to you. It could be, in a way, but I cannot believe it is the full answer though.”

“Why not? What else could have influenced me to create a protector when no other Robert can. Allan, they have all tried to.”

“Perhaps it has something to do with the experiences of your soul in previous lives?”

“Nonsense. All other Roberts can only have split from me after birth; at conception will be the earliest possible. We have the same souls, since there was only one reality at that time.” He grew fascinated by the idea. “We were the only reality when he started writing, but as soon as the first alt reality split from us, they all existed from the start of time, without changing the alt Roberts and Cherines. Till the end of time, all new split off realities will have existed from the start of time.” He sort of glared at Allan. “The two of you are trying to drive us crazy!”

Alki said, “Why is it so important Roberto? Do you wish the others to have a protector or do you fear it?”

Stunned and slightly insulted he stared at Alki. “Fear it?”

“You do not? You would be willing to have the fate of all Cherinians depend on them also?”

“Why not? They are me after all.”

His keen sharp eyes bored into Robbie. “You would trust the fate of Cherine and your family to them? Which one of them Roberto?”

“I…”He gave up the struggle. “Not now Alki. In the beginning I would have been happy to. I’ve been spoilt, I’m used to being the one who makes the decisions.”

“Nonsense. It is only your fear to trust another. Roberto mou, in the beginning all you cared about was your family. You have grown so that every Cherinian, every life-form is your responsibility. When I began going into business on my own I would have gladly taken in a partner with money and would have been accustomed to sharing the responsibilities. Not now. It would not matter what advantages come with a partner, I cannot allow another to make decisions for me. The companies are my babies, I have led and nurtured them to the point where they are, and what they are is because of me. My family mean much more to me than any business and yet I entrust their wellbeing and safety to you and Cherine. It is similar to the way any man, however powerful, has to trust in his government, police force, army, doctors and so on. Hear me Roberto and do not allow your emotions to blind you to my words; if another Roberto finds a way to create his own protector, it will split the Cherinians. Any Roberto will first look to caring for his own loved ones - it will take them a lot of time and it will need them to grow as you did, before they can care about all of us in the same way.”

“You always see the truth Alki, even where I fear to. I can’t argue with you, but even if I could, what would be the point? I can’t alter anything. If Sam is right, only Arthur can.”

“Not even Arthur, Robbie. Not anymore.” I giggled. “At least, I think he can’t unless he gets stinking drunk and does it just for a lark.”

He scowled at me. “You have a weird sense of humour. What else can he do if he got stinking drunk?”

“Allan?” I realised he was not in a joking mood so I quickly went on. “Robert, what if he changed you into a girl and me into a man? Actually, it might be a good idea. Not making me a man, but changing you into a female. Women, females in all our animals, they are the protectors of the young. It is sort of queer having a male protector.”

3090

Even Marian and Cherine found it funny, but Robbie sent out his energy and grabbed me so that I cannot run away. He put Cherine down and came to me. “You think you are funny!?”

I began to laugh hysterically, you know, the kind where you can’t stop, even when your sides hurt. Suddenly he raised me and held me tenderly. Next thing I knew Dommi and Cherine were in my mind and then Wendy followed. I could hear myself laughing and wondered why they were acting so concerned, what is wrong with me laughing?

As I drifted out of a fog I heard Cherine berating herself, telling everyone she was so sorry, she had not realised I was still so close to the edge. In a dream-like manner I wondered what she meant. I did not feel it was important and drifted back to sleep.

I found out later that Dommi kept me asleep for the night and half of the next day. They took turns being in my mind to keep nightmares away and sweeten my dreams. I woke up feeling like a million dollars. I stretched lazily and only then saw them all sitting watching me. I remembered and flushed. “I’m sorry, I don’t know what came over me.”

Diana said, “It’s alright baby. Aganthi is making you a lovely breakfast. Have a shower, it will make you feel nice.”

I was in a good mood, but as I lathered and rinsed myself I began to think seriously. I came out dressed, but drying my hair (Alki, Allan and Eleni were still with us. Marian had taken their little American girl to their house).

“I had a sort of breakdown, didn’t I?” I could see it in their minds and eyes. “But that is silly, how can I?”

“Because Cherinians are so healthy?”

“No dad! Because our minds are so healthy. Our links to each other, the comfort of being part of a family, inside where it matters.”

“For the rest of them, you are right. You and me though, we are not that healthy my love. We hide things inside us because we worry about the others. You’ve seen the same thing happen to me, did you think you are some kind of supergirl and immune?”

“It didn’t feel like I was doing anything wrong!” I turned to Cherine and hugged her. “I’m sorry I made you feel guilty. It wasn’t your fault.” I grinned at her. “Anyway, I’m famished! Can I go eat?”

Just like all the others I have always known how important Cherine is to all of us. I’ve placed her on a pedestal (and I’m going to keep her there) and anything she wants is alright with me - even if we argue a bit now and then. As the years have gone by, I’ve felt within her the growth and with it a strength and powers or gifts that she never uses. Yes, I’d known how special she is, but had not realised how much I love her. Even a few seconds of fear that she was leaving us had sent a shock through to the core.

Allan had taken over watching me as I ate and thought. “I remember once, many years ago, I was driving in town. I came across a fair and the streets and grounds were packed with families. I decided to park and walk around, hoping to see some pretty girls. Spending most of my time in my flat, never seeing people and especially children, was a sterile way to live. I saw a parked car moving out. I looked in my mirror and saw the lights of a car in the distance behind me and felt it was safe to stop to get the parking space. I heard the squeal of tyres behind me and the lights were dancing around as the driver lost control. To avoid me he swung over and his car aimed for all those families. He had been travelling, the police estimated, at over 140 kilometres an hour within a 40 kilometres per hour zone.

The car hit a concrete block and tumbled, not sidewise, but over its front bumper, onto its roof and over again. Three times Sam!! The roof was squashed into the car. I did not worry about the driver, all I could think of was the little children who will be killed because I had wanted to stop and look at them. Those seconds were a nightmare I would not wish on my worst enemy.

The car came to a stop and I was by this time running over. Nobody had been hit. By some miracle the car had tumbled within an empty patch, people all over, but not within that space! I helped get the driver and his passenger out of the back window. They did not even have a scratch! Just bruises.” He smiled. “The driver attacked me, trying to hit me. Others who had helped get them out separated us. The police took a statement and it went to trial where he admitted guilt.

Next [Book 05] - Post 030

I hope you enjoy reading this story of fantasy, adventure and love - and should some of it be true for our reality, I hope you will love our Cherine.

Αλέξανδρος Ζήνον Ευσταθίου

(Alexander Zenon Eustace)

^{24th November, 2019}

• posted: 24th November, 2019
  
  
  
  
  

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