Lack of Confidence or apprehension ?
I wanted to write about my steem journey but I've postponded till the weekend. During weekdays it's really hard to manage time to write something time taking. As i was thinking my life is really hard because being a sleepy girl with a busy life is really very hard XD.
I picked up a pretty different topic to write on but the fact is i more often suffer such condition. Yea when it comes to having some interaction with strangers i don't feel comfortable. Is it because of lack of confidence or apprehension? For this attitude many time I got criticism and got some harsh word like rude, arrogant etc..
I am very choosy about people and even about things. I don't get along with people easily. I have kind of such nature. And to be honest i really don't like my this habit. I am very selective about people. Once someone asked me what is your favourite place. I told i don't have a favourite place i have my favourite people when i talk to them and have fun with them then that place becomes my favourite.
But Talk to strangers is really not my thing. I need to work on this is why I've selected this topic to write.
I truly believe that i am enough confident girl when it comes to having a presentation in front of the whole class or even in front of the whole University. But still, there is a huge difference between having a presentation or an interaction with an individual especially if you are meeting with them the first time.
Just imagine you see someone who you admire it could be anywhere maybe in a cafe or just walking along the street or anywhere but you struggle with starting a conversation with that particular person. Because of this struggling situation, you might miss the chance of having a conversation with them or the person you wanted to interact with have moved on. Time is up and the moment has passed. It happened to me when my favourite music band visited our University. I have had clear cut chance to interact with them but i missed and i still feel pain. I always accused myself that i wasn't enough confident. This is why i missed that chance.
But the story is not over yet i worked on it I read some articles i watched some videos and tried to make sure it never happened again.
We all know we all are different human beings with different characteristics. we all use different ways to interact with others. Some people prefer to listen to people instead of getting engaged with them. Some people believe in interaction. I get engaged with people where i love to have interaction.
I read somewhere stop hearing yourself and start listening to others. I still don't grab this why? why we should stop hearing ourself and start listening to others? so i always get this answer from myself you can't be the one talking all the time sometimes you need to listen to others too. Although i am failed to implement this on myself i hope in future I'd be able to grasp.
Alright, one best tip which is pretty useful in my case if you want to get interacted with a stranger who you admire and facing trouble to start a conversation. Then try to find something good in their physical appearance and then compliment them like i used this trick on my one senior. I started admiring her because of her stage performance. She acted on one folk tale. She acted really well. I wanted to talk to her and i just said Hey you did an amazing job and you are looking so beautiful. Do you know people do appreciate or like compliments? Well actually everyone loves compliments.
There are two ways of giving compliments to others. If you're confident enough then go ahead and compliment them but you needn't be very straight blunt every time. You can always choose the middle way though. You can subtly or indirectly complement them. Ummmm, am i making sense? :P XD
I am finishing up this post with these lines. I always wanted to say this to someone very special but i never said. I didn't have much courage to say. Again your confidence doesn't work always.
I wanted to let him know that when i first met him he was an ordinary, and respected person to me but over time now he is the only one i could ever find in a crowded place.
That's all for now see ya and goodnight peeps. I have started writing epistles LOL.
These days i am in love with abstract art so this is why i am sharing one of abstract art image here XD
Good read. In my experience it's apprehension. Some people are just wary of strangers.
You know, a lot of people try hard to change when sometimes it's just you being you - you don't have to be like anyone else. There is no set standard of living in this world. There is no right way to be. Unless it's causing you really harsh real world problems, then that's probably a thing you need to work on.
The people that make you feel bad for being yourself -- have you ever considered that it may be them who are the one's with the problem? A lot of people get so fixated in their own world perspective that they struggle with anything that's different to how they do and view things. It's a realm of control. But that's a story for another day.
So you're quiet and reserved -- nothing wrong in that! keep being you - it's what we like :)
OMG so sweet of you Ray You just made my day thank you so much for such a nice reply i just loved it :)
Glad you did :)